Is romance truly possible in your middle age years? Well, yes, unless of course average is all you expect. Deep down most people want more. I don’t think anyone goes into a relationship hoping average is the best they can achieve. Women want to be swept off their feet, and men want to be someone’s knight in shining armor. Turning 50 this month has gotten me thinking about a lot of things. One of which is my marriage. I am more in love with my wife than I ever was, but we still have work to do. My hope has always been, that one day my kids will be able to say of us, “I want to have a marriage just like Mom and Dad.” How awesome would that be?
Let’s be honest, if romance is what you seek (which you should), being consistent throughout a long-term relationship is very difficult to do. What you don’t want to do, is avoid the problem long enough where you start to find romance somewhere else. Keep in mind, the word romance simply means, “a feeling of excitement, a mystery associated with love.” If you are married or in a serious relationship, would you characterize it as exciting (I am talking overall, realizing we all have life stuff that gets in the way now and then), what about mysterious, meaning does it keep you on your toes, challenges you in a good way?
If you want the bottom line, here you go—Your relationship will die on the vine, if you aren’t finding new and consistent ways to keep romance alive. I can’t stress enough, how important this is for you. Of all my blog posts the past three years, dating ideas and romance-related posts continue to be some of the most popular. That tells me to keep going! Drum roll please….since you know that I love lists, check out the list below for new date ideas and other tips to make your relationship more exciting and mysterious. Enjoy!
Have your kids plan a date night. Let’s face it, coming up with ideas for a romantic date night can be tough for some of us. We may have crashed and burned so many times we are afraid to try again, or we may be overwhelmed with the amount of choices (or lack of choices) in our area. May sound crazy but give your kids a chance to plan a date for you. But if you do this, make sure you follow through with it.
Make a romantic playlist of songs from each decade. We are an 80’s couple and we did something like this and we loved it. Like us, you may find yourself laughing more than anything at some songs from the past (and what our clothes and hairstyles were like then), but that can be the best part. When you make the playlist, it can be something you create as a surprise or you could both choose songs and build something fun.
Conversation a little stale? Book club for two! With the weather getting a little colder, this idea is perfect for those who like to stay inside. Choose a book from a genre you both like, or a topic you both want to explore and start reading. Set aside some time to talk each week about the characters and the story. A book club for two is a great way to connect and NOT talk about the run-of-the-mill things like grocery and household to-do lists.
Take the weekend and get away. Sometimes we just need to break up the humdrum now and then and get away, even if its one night. Have you ever tried an Airbnb or a bread and breakfast? There are tons of creative options out there or just pick a decent hotel in the same city. It’s really not about picking the perfect place to stay, it’s more about making the effort to get away and doing something a little different together. We got it keep it fresh!
Is romance possible in your middle age years, absolutely, but it’s really up to both of you whether average is good enough?
Got any suggestions I can share? The more creative and outlandish the better. If you enjoyed this week’s blog, you can support us by sharing it with your friends on social media—we would like to see our audience continue to grow. Thanks.
Your Virtual Life Mentor,
Doug